The Importance of Personal Connections

Disclosure: As a reminder I don't go back and correct any mental errors while writing because that is true to how my brain works with living with epilepsy. In order to understand this by someone just joining, one example at times I might speak a seteances out ouf order, or repeat them, spelling.

Why are Social Relationships important when living with Epilepsy?

First off this does not include family relationships, and how they support those that live with epilepsy. I am fortunate in this aspect, I have a large understanding by my family on what i/we need. Yes, even in this area it is tough at times. There is nothing that can compare to family. Topic for another day.

Studies have shown that having personal connections/friends we spend time with boosts not only our mood but also our quality of life and the length of living. This is especially true due to anxiety and depresion as part of most of us living with epielpsy.

Many of us that live with epilepsy, are not able to drive. That is just the starting factor of making it difficult to connect with others. In my area itself does not have public transportations, not even uber drivers. Even if we did, it is not safe for me to travel by myself(this is not true for all that live with epilepsy) as it is never known if or when I might have a seizure occur and most of the time in public transportation they do not know how to handle someone a seizure and do not even recognize it. I also cannot even take a walk around the block by myself. I have always been an active person and do exercise in our home. You never realize how differnt it feels to not be able to go for walks by yourself, until it is taken from you by uncontrolled seizures.

I never realized how isolated I felt until Brent and I became empty nesters. When you have kids in school, you have relationships at least when at events to have those social interactions raises your mood(most of the time).

What I do to build and have Social Relationships.

This was not an easy transition for me, and it is something I constantly have to work on. I tend to be too hard to myself due to the friendships that have gone away. I blame myself and always ask, I should be able to fix this, what am I doing wrong to not have that friend anymore? When you have uncontrolled epilepsy, you truly find out who are those that will be by your side no matter what you go through in life.

I treasure those that take time to see me in person, even when they work FT and have their own busy lives. (i belive you know who you are) They check in first and come to pick me up to go on walks outside in the park. This is not only good for my mental mood by being outside, but also physically as well. The face to face conversations cannot ever be more helpful, blessed I get that when possible. Laughter always brings an extra smile on my face too. I bet at times I probably talk too much, since I am alone a lot...apologies there. They also have taken me to appointments and also offer to take me places when Brent is unable to do it. Not to forget a girls day for mani/pedi or squeeze in a lunch. Even just dropping by for a quick chat, making me something special to raise my day. As you can see these brighten my heart and thankful for the days it can happen. Always a hug thrown in there, personal touch raises moods.

Zoom calls/ FaceTime me when I am alone. There are friends that do not live close, so they ask to chat via a zoom/FaceTime. This way it is still having that face to face interaction, catching up our lives. Many times it is talking about our families, and what we have all been up to. Others it might be reminsicing about different stages of our lives we have gone through even if not im person. Then there is a group of us that all have a differnt type of invisible condition and we can understand what each of us deals with daily. So at times, this can be the sharing of something that happened that we feel guilty for it happening but what did we do to make ourselves to feel better. This group is also helpful in a different way. We remind eachother we didn't choose these lifestyles, but we can choose on what we do to live our best lives.

Phone calls, text messages, DM via Twitter and emails. This may not be face to face, but just the fact there are those that keep in touch no matter the fact of me having epilepsy means the world. These are usually ones that work FT, and don't have the flexibilty for an in person chat. Most of these are also out of state or even if in FL in a diffferent time zone. The text messages I know some think aren't as good as a phone call, but these mean just as much to me. Many at work cannot just pick up the phone to call but can text between their job duties or if they are home and have to do things for their kids. Sending pics of our families to eavh other is something special to share. I apologize to those whom I forget to call/text back or send too many back as I don't recall doing it(brain glitch)

Starting up Blog and part of epilepsy SM groups(I only have Twitter now).

I know most out there talk about the bad things due to SM outlets. For those of us that have conditions where we can't be places, it is a place where we connect with someone living the same/similar hurdles daily. A fellow SM epilepsy advocate reached out to me by reading my blog, and wanted to learn more. Thanked me for sharing our family journey over the years of talking the full truth and not hide behind what some do on SM. The key reason i began MyGlitch blog(a bit of encouragment from my hubby:)to start with was due to living in a new place, and wanting to connect with others that either have epilepsy or have a family member. I have always been a person who raises awareness for epilepsy in every place we have lived, and when we moved I needed those new connections and it provided me a new purpose while making new relationships. I have made many special friendships via my blog and have felt the purpose of being able to help them as they help me just by reaching out with questions. Greatfull that I have had friends who direct people they know that now live with epilepsy or a family member.

I know I didn't mention anyone's name.

I didn't want to leave a name out and then

have my own guilt set in by doing so.

I hope those out there, know who you are just by the words I wrote.

Which isn't even enough to show my love to all of you!

I hope all that read any of my blog entries/share them, know how special it is for me just to have you do that as well.